Sun-day

Right, the moment when the sun becomes so precious. I've come to love day time so much these days. Years ago, night time is all that I wanted. Today, I love day time. It could be really really hot. But there could be so much fun and things to be done in the day time. There's so much hope, there's so much energy in day time. I guess the meditation is doing me a lot of good thing. In days to come, there could be much more of self-awakening moments and I'm looking forward. Sun-day. Indeed, it's a sunny day. Very misty this morning, without drizzle or rain *touch wood*. Still, it's cold. 

An afternoon in the rain

It's surprisingly cold even though there's sunlight out there. Mainly because that the sunlight doesn't last. Every half an hour or so, the rain came by to visit. When it rained, it was cold. When the sun shines, it's really hot. Now, I need to find the balance in between. And so, this noon, we went to the farm to pick some fresh vegetables for salad. The moment we began to do that, it was beginning to shower! What can I say? When we're already in the rain, I go with the saying by Bob Marley, "some feel the rain, others just get wet". I chose to feel the rain instead of just get wet. Anyway, I think the jet lag is over now. All ready for daily meditation session. Doing better after the first day. Looking forward to more of the meditation session. It's soul healing, inner-self communication and full stop. What more can I ask for. Hello ME, again ^_^

Lost somewhere

It must have been quite some time since I last remember that I was lost, I mean specifically, lost in a town. Now I recalled, I was lost in one of the vineyard area last year. This time round, I wasn't really went lost, but lost 'contact'. The very few things I could do, 1. Walked home and found nobody's home, so sent a very brief SMS, 2. Walked to another person's home, and nobody's home too, but got wifi connection for Whatsapp, 3. Home sweet home (literally). Another experience in town with my extraordinarily limited language knowledge. 

As I was 'lost', I gained something in return. It has been a long long while since I last meditated. And that was what I did this morning. Problem with jet lag, waking up too often in the middle of the night, the body keeps reminding you that you should begin getting active now, it's time to wake up! So, well, I woke up at 6am. All awake by the 'not-so-freezing-yet' cold shower. And meditated for half an hour. 

For once, I controlled my mind again. It's a very beautiful exercise for the mind. Not only I started to notice the rise and fall of incidences and thoughts in my mind, I regain balance in between my mind and my body. But it's a long way to go before my mind can work beautifully again.

For some reason or so, I've gained another 'finger snapping' moment when I grab hold on my camera again. They are so many breathe taking moments or shots capture from the eye of the lens. Come to think about it, it was actually a certain spot of the entire view that was being captured in the way we want it to be. So, whether it's 'good' or 'bad' chosen for the highlight, it's entirely up to us. Most of the time, we chose the 'better' spot for our captions and omit the non-necessary part altogether. 

Photo shooting, we always choose the better spot for highlight. Surprisingly, in life, many of us are focusing on the 'bad' spot for highlight and omit the 'good' spot altogether. Is it merely because mind is not abstract, hence people tend to neglect the good side of it? While for scenery, it's not entirely abstract, but it can be seen and that's the difference. 

A good insight from a few pages read from the book titled 'Straight from the Heart'. Very insightful. Hello 'mind', let's cooperate and form a better 'me'.

My first autumn in my life

After a 24-hour journey, I'm finally back to the airports I'm familiar with. No doubt, the sun is as precious as diamond here, my own thought. With such temperature, there's nothing as good as the warmth of the sunlight. Up to now, everything's quite in place, except for the jet lag. Generally, my first few meals were meals in the plane. Later, with some good stuff, improvised Thai instant noodle for lunch (which should be my dinner back in Malaysia). And for dinner, yummy! Do you know me well enough? Yes. My favourite salmon sashimi! Goodness. Am I dreaming? No. What more can I complain for now. None. 

Of course, there should be some work to be done within the next couple of days, while overcoming the jet lag. 

Last night, yawned all the way from 6pm till 10pm (local time). Managed to sleep by 12am but things that happened next, waking up every now and then. My body was telling me that it's already morning and activities shall begin right now =.=" I thought it was at least 4am at that moment. To my disappointment, it wasn't. It was only 1am. Should really be better for days to come. Anyway, hello autumn! It's completely different when the season changes. Hello meditation. Hello inner self ^_^

Be positive

The first thing upon switching on the radio, television, flipping newspapers and social media, there are probably 60% and above of negative news. Natural disasters, accidents, kidnapping, robberies, abuse and the list goes on forever. While many of us are complicating our life with 1001 problems and issues, they are many out there who face only one challenge, the struggle to live. All that they need is food and shelter. They did not chose to be who they are, but they strive to live. What about us? What about me? 

I've been reading so many self motivating books all this while. And kept reminding myself to think positively. Now that I think about it, why is it so hard for me to be positive? Answers to my questions, are as much as excuses I could give. Life is hard, the world is never peaceful, life has never been fair and on and on. Therefore, I need to have positive mindset, positive conversation, positive people around me and the list goes on forever again.

Come to think about those who have the least, as little as not having enough food to fulfil their daily needs. As far as I'm concerned, I have not come across any article or news that reports on the need for the less fortunate to think positively in order to survive. All that they do is to act to survive. 

Conclusion, sometimes, it's not the thought that counts. Actions matter.

Source from: http://automationclinic.com/blog/on-taking-immediate-action/

The value

Source from: http://fullwallpaperhd.com/free-love-wallpapers-for-desktop/

It was just one hour ago when I saw this statement from the drama I was watching.

"People used to fix the faulty electrical items and keep using it. Now, most people change an item whenever there is new model in the market (regardless if the existing item is still working very well)."

Not long after, I saw another scene from an another unrelated drama. I summarise it as such:

"People used to make an effort to 'save' or 'fix' a broken marriage. Now, more and more people call for a divorce whenever they started to desire for something else than the marriage. A marriage, it was once simpler, without grand wedding day, yet, last a lifetime."

As for myself, I'm still using a camera my parents bought for me 6 years ago. About 10 months ago, the lens began to malfunction. I've left the camera aside since then. Occasionally, trying it out in the hope that it may be good all over again, but it doesn't happen. Well, what can I say. So, I've waited long enough before deciding to get a new lens for it. Until recently, I was tempted to get a brand new camera, and it was one that I 'thought' I'll love to have. But the price doubled the price of getting a good lens. And I was in a dilemma for yet another 5 months. Within these 5 months, I've actually went in and out of the camera shop for up to 5 times to reconsider on my options.

Finally, I've kicked my butt and dropped by the shop once again today. Prior to entering the shop, I looked from outside for minutes. And I turned around, walked, spent yet another 1 hour time to think. Finally, finally, I've bought it. Surprisingly, I'm happy. Much happier that I thought I would, despite of spending a huge sum of bucks for it. So does my camera. I know my camera well enough to get the best shots I could. And my camera understands me well enough, to cope with my way of using it. Simply, loving it.

Question: Is value merely a measurement of money and having the latest model, most expensive item, biggest, most luxurious stuff today? What about the value that is never measurable? Have we move forward, or are we moving backward by being the slave of marketing strategy?

My love for the beauty of nature

There are two ways to live, one is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as if everything is. -Albert Einstein-

I crave for the beauty of nature. 'There is nothing special', one may say. But it is all about how one look at it and appreciate it. At least, I told myself, it takes one's sincerity to feel and to realise the beauty and importance of one's existence. Most importantly, one needs not seek for recognition from other people to second one's belief (the positive one, of course). But when there is such recognition received, it's definitely a bonus and a blessing ^_^ Stay positive, and have faith on one's belief. 

Another chapter

The event is finally over! And my energy bar went straight to -1% in a glimpse of light once that I have my very first lunch for the 2-day fast or I should say, detoxing? ^.^

Honestly, it was good to be involved in a preparation work but it was awful when one does not get to taste the sweet fruit of the outcome. And this happen to me. It's either one, to be involved, or to enjoy the sweet fruit. It hardly happen to me to be in both situations. Or maybe it did happened, but not that I can recall of any at this moment.

Somehow, I'm glad that my 'turbo' mode has once again been turned on, no doubt that it leaves me exhausted in the end. To overcome this, I just need something else to turn on my 'turbo' mode or to keep myself active all over again. And this is the aim for the moment. Or else, I'll be left in nowhere feeling lost, without direction, and that's definitely not a good feeling.

Of all the things, I'm so glad that I have a team of members with perfect combination, and ever ready to be in assistant throughout the entire event. In daily job, they have been a great team. I can see spotlights shining on them. It will be just a matter of time.

Another thing that I appreciate, are the new people that I met along the way and they have been very helpful regardless of all the last minute arrangement that took place. I can proudly say that I was brought to another new level of last minute solution provider now. With this group of people with many wisdom to share too, things that I do not get everyday, or much. Indescribable.

Last but not least, I met an old acquaintance in the event too. It has been about 5 years since we last met. Towards the end of the whole event, the only word that sticks to my mind, mature. A word that has not been used to describe me for a very long time, once again come back to me. It was in my teenage years when people used to say that I'm mature for that teenage age, but not in my twenties. I think this must be first. Looking at the bright side, it's a compliment ^.^

Source from: http://www.kartoen.be/wp/2008/09/23/holy-trinity/

A reflection

Looks like this year is the first year ever that I'm keeping my blog updated so often compared to the last couple of years. I believe that I'm back into the mood to write! I might be missing myself who used to be so quiet and write so much. Thus, the result of this. But I'm glad for it. At least, for years to come, there's a good reflection on myself when I was younger and 'now'. Always. At the moment, for this blog alone, I managed to reflect something about myself for the last few years and it's good to have such opportunity.

For the past 3.5 weeks, I've been rushing for so much of things for one special event. And it's only 2 days to go before the very day. Hoping that everything is going to be fun-tastic! *Fingers crossed*

Just two days ago, someone whom I respect for his leadership, told me about this. The last thing that a person would want to do is to kill his hope. I believe that this apply to faith too. I heard the sound of a finger snap in my mind at that very moment. "Wow, have I killed my hope?" I thought I did.

Therefore, for now, I must relive all that in my hope. It's one of the important pillars of life. So, good luck to myself once more for the event and, hope.

Source from: http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/15717943-hopeless

After a night of thunderstorm

After a week of chaotic situation on the haze, the sky is finally clearing. What more to ask for when there is this thunderstorm with heavy rain that took place last midnight to celebrate the end of the smoggy atmosphere in Kuantan air. The wonder of nature, and the great act of nature. Come to think about this, I can't help to think that I am hurting the mother earth from day-to-day life. At this very moment, we are talking about technology. The next, we can't survive without the printed record on hardcopy (paper made from tree pulp). The cause may goes all the way back to a few thousand years back when the first piece of paper was created. Not to forget, back then, China never impose such law as to restrict only one child per family. What is the population back then? What is the population today?

The source of nature is able to accommodate the needs of human beings back then. But look at today, we are digging more and more resources from the mother earth. To balance it, we should have return what we have taken, but wait... what did we return? The fancy packaging to attract consumers and ends up as a non-recyclable rubbish in the dump site? Tonnes of paper kept for at least 7 years before we can at least send it to recycle centre so that records are available when needs arise?

I can't stop thinking. My pair of hands are very dirty, this pair of hand can't even be compared to those pair of hands that are really covered with dirt for the sake of planting or protecting the mother earth. I dare not even to think, annually, how many tonnes of waste have I disposed? But at least, I'm proud to say that I have never waste my food.

I am sorry, mother earth. For I have ill-treated you and not doing much good for you. I feel worse when I come to think that our next generations are going to deal with the waste we have leave behind for them. Come to think about this, I believe that this is the beginning of the generation of greed for we tend to stop thinking for our future when we realise there is not much we have done to hand a good future for our children.

Why education when conscience does not exist? And my heart weeps till the day that I finally do my very best part to be the eco-buddy of the nature :"(

For the longest time

Indeed, this is a song title by Billy Joel. I love it especially when it's being sung in the form of a capella. My all time favourite. Regardless of the lyric, the rhythm itself is almost killing me.

Now back to the key point of 'for the longest time'.

1. What have I not been doing for the longest time?
2. What have I been liking for the longest time?
3. What have I wanted to do for the longest time?
4. What have I been forgetting for the longest time?
5. What have I kept for the longest time?
6. What have I been missing for the longest time?

And the list goes on and on. When I start questioning myself on all of this, I realise that I've forgotten many that I sometimes lead an auto pilot life. Just a couple of days ago, I was filing all my utilities bill and official documents. When I come to the World Vision file, I can't help but to remind myself there's something I've not forgotten, but avoided to do, yet, pretended that I'd forgotten. What was that? To write letters to our sponsored children. Why avoid? I sure believe I do have sufficient time to do that. But I seemed to have many excuses for not doing it. One minute, I got hooked up on the internet, the next minute, I got hooked up with gym, and the next hour with television (gosh, this sure is a 'killer'). Was it really that hard to get those letters written?

N.O. It isn't hard at all. The hardest part, which is also the easiest, is to do it with all my heart. In another word, with sincerity. Oh gosh! Have I lost my heart? Have I lost my sincerity? As I type and type, I realise, I've been lazying too much and relied heavily on the 'auto-pilot' mode for my life, that many things that I've done and went through meant nothing. Wow. How long has that been? I don't know. But I can't do much to change the past. All that I have is now. It's time to stop the auto-pilot mode and take charge of my journey. I guess the auto-pilot mode was my scapegoat in case if anything goes wrong. And that's totally wrong! Bad me, naughty me, thoughtless me! It probably went on and off for the past 3 years. Until now, that I'm ready for it. Nothing should stop me from turning into the manual mode. Bonne chance!

Source from: http://crunkyjuice.deviantart.com/art/Positive-wallpaper-159290224

The rusty brain

Whew... I must admit. My brain had went rusty! And this is no good. Why so? Mainly because I've been lazying for too long. To prevent myself from getting useless, I have to start being useful now. An hour ago, I'd tried to type out my recent thought and after about 300 words, I figure that it was a mess and dump it altogether. 

The first thing I should really do now is to update my journal. It has been some time since I last open it. Furthermore, there has been too many excuses that I've been making to give way for my laziness craving. Well, it's really good that now, I could spend some good time to judge myself instead of controlling myself from judging people. Perhaps, that applies to, in order to stop thinking about A, all that I have to do is to start thinking about B and automatically, A will be out of mind! So, why try to hard not to think about A?! Haha. Well, that's what I've got from one of my reading recently. To stay positive, start thinking positively as the mind can't think of both positive and negative stuff at one same time! One moment, I thought, wow! Really? The next moment, now, I realise, yes, it is indeed! It means what I've read have now come into practical. 

Over the next couple of months, I foresee that I'll be on an adventure and leaving some so called reality behind for a short while. Can't wait! It's going to be awesome!~ Who knows, the adventure turns out to be the reality! Reality or not, the one who's being in it deserves the right to judge it over the people who just sit and watch ^.^ 

Source from: http://funny-pics.co/tags/deep-thinking-funny-pics/

Pelindung Hill, finally, after almost a year...

Have been lazying for so many weekends that I'd failed to wake up early (not so early actually, it was 7.30am, not able to join Sharma's 5.00am club still).

It is of course, my precious weekend. And I've made full use of my weekend today. Managed to wake up 'early', got ready and head off to Pelindung Hill. After the fireflies sighting trip last night in Cherating, I'm very sure that I must get in touch with the nature even more. Thus, kept my promise to myself to wake up no matter how, and go for the walk uphill.

It was cloudy, it drizzled, and finally, it rained... But well, it was all good. For the beautiful sound of nature, the cry of the crickets, the chirping morning birds (this reminded me of the song by Cat Steven, 'Morning has broken'), and the precious sound of the rain in the rainforest.

I know, it isn't quite a rainforest, but it is remaining as original as it could be, I can't complain more, despite of the telecommunication towers that have been built for so many years up there. Still, I get to get in touch with the mother nature very closely and enjoyed the incredible chill in the morning! Love that - after so long...

As it started to rain when I was getting closer to the mid junction part, the rain started to pour in. And that was when I started to grab my phone and recorded the sound of nature, and some photos. Soothing, cooling. It could be incomparable, but it sure was as good as being in the bed and snuggling in the blanket!

Walking in the rain, with sweat all over the body, I can't really differentiate which part was the rain water and which was the sweat. Silly me, of course they blended. And it was this kind of feeling that keep me feeling alive! Sometimes, I must say, the best things are just around the corner. Just apply rule #1, learn to appreciate! Sure enough, it depends a lot on what is one craving for at that very moment. Anyhow, it was a fun-tastic Sunday morning walk uphill ^.^

A year of wonder, and a year to wonder and ponder

*Keep believing, that's
where the strength is

I didn't quite much realise that the last post I've made was exactly a year ago.. not that exact. To be exact, that will be 1 year and 4 days. Gee.. I've been lazying for so long. Probably I've been spending more time to.. what? Now I need to think carefully of what have I done for the past one year. Eventually, the very best remark of the year would be my birthday. Apparently, I did not make it for the climb this year. Too many plans in mind that had eventually caused no focus at all. But well, everyday is different. For the past one year, no doubt, I've met many wonderful people all around me. And at some point, I'd probably disguised myself as somebody else, did I? Well, I did. For instant, I would have chose to keep my mouth shut in most occasion. But for some reason, I turned out to be one of the annoying 'talk box' in certain occasion. Eew.. therefore, I know that I need more time for myself this year. Thinking about the past one year, it was the first time ever in my life that I'd stepped out of South East Asia, and I was in the south west of France, hosted by a wonderful friend who'd throw me a surprise by joining me in the Mt Kinabalu climb last year. 

*The sky was still bright at 10.00pm, minus the sun ^.^

For the very first time being in a foreign country, all alone, that's a new thing for me, perhaps I'm a lil' old for it, but hey, who cares. It's my very own experience that I'm enjoying ^.^ Although we have tropical climate for the entire year in Malaysia, but the summer I had was mesmerizing. With the summer festival all around the area, it was good. Having the chance to help out some people to shifting house in France, being taught dancing steps, playing musical instrument that I'd never tried before, enjoying beautiful music all around the village in the late evening, yet the sky was still relatively bright at 10pm, having the experience of being 'stung' by some kind of plants named 'oak-ti' (that's how it's being pronounced) and later being told that I'm a real French for having the experience of being 'stung' by that very plant (eew... it's painful =.=") and the list goes one forever. True, there may be culture differences, but still, all of us are human. I am a firm believer of the saying, "There's only one race in this world, and that is HUMAN-race". It is probably some negative belief system that could have contributed to so many nasty things that happen all around us. 

*The music festival over the
summer in St Macaire

Sometimes I think to myself, I am so small, as small as a micro-dust in this world (not to mention, the universe), yet, I am a significant being - to something, someone, in somewhere. Everyone has their own value, and that includes all living being in this world. Therefore, all of us deserve respect. It was so much that I'd experienced for the past 12 months that I'd somehow slowed down in my plan. Hence, have not done much up to now. But well, it wouldn't be long till I start being active again. This, I promise myself ^.^